The checkup on 38weeks 6days

Bam. It hit me so bad. Doctor just said my cervix is CLOSED. I am so scared and disappointed. The internal checking was so uncomfortable. It's like he is digging for something inside with all his fingers and all just might. :( yet turn out my cervix is not even opened. 

And then he says baby's head is not facing down yet. So when he go pass the birth canal it might be a problem for him. 

I have walked so far with Riordan. Really dowan anything to happen to me and him. God, take away all complications and let Riordan be born in the best circumstances.